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A child's perspective

The cancer journey is more than chemotherapy, radiation and hair loss.

A look from a child's perspective - "I have been in this hospital bed for a long time, and I really just want to go home. I miss my sister, and I miss my Dad. I look over at my Mom asleep on the couch, and I smile because she is always right here. But I worry about her because I can hear her cry really loud when she takes a shower. I know she is worried about me. But I'm working really hard to do everything that is asked of me. But everyone asks a lot. And there are always a lot of people coming in and out of my room all day and all night. The doctors and nurses always ask the same question, "How do you feel today Brooke?" They examine me and touch me and hook me up to more things. I have tubes in my nose, two lines dangling from my chest, a blood pressure thing, a line in my arm and a big IV pole that is always with me. And for some reason, everything they give me makes me sick to my stomach. I can 't make it to the bathroom because of my iv pole so I have to throw up all day in a little pink bucket that my mom holds for me. I wish I could eat some Chick fil A but I just can't.

I lay in bed trying to watch Dora the Explorer but I do this everyday. So I decided to get up. I unplug my iv pole from the wall and hold all my IV lines in one hand and pull my pole with the other. I climb on the couch by my mom and go sit on the window ledge. I press my head against the glass and watch as everyone scurries around. I see a big brown truck making deliveries. I see all the parking attendants directing traffic. I see doctors and nurses going to lunch. I see lots of kids too. I wish I was them. I wish I was outside. I wish I could go to the playground. I asked my mom to tell me a story about our vacation last year. I close my eyes and pretend I'm there. I'm getting really good at pretending. Sometimes I pretend my hospital room is my school classroom. My favorite is to pretend I'm a princess in a castle and a ferocious monster always tries to capture me. This helps me have some fun. I even decorate my IV pole sometimes. This is funny. But I still just want to go home. I miss my room. I miss my dogs. I miss my toys. I miss my friends. I miss riding my bike. I miss being free. I miss everything."

The journey through cancer, especially one for a child, is truly incomprehensible. BUT BIG Love helps to bring the joys of childhood a little closer.

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